*Warning* May be a boring blog... ; ) just feeling the need to write...
Getting back into the routine wouldn't be so bad if there was a routine to get back into. Everything is so different this fall. I'm certainly feeling the pressure from every angle.
(In fact, I should be analysing TEKS, and NOT blogging... oh well.)
I guess this isn't my typical chipper blog mood. This Monday was pretty rough. My weekend was spent working on an in-depth literary analysis resource file project. All I had to do was put the finishing touches on the last paragraph of the last book. (This = catching up on that stack of reading!) Nope. When I hit the save button, my zip drive spazed out, froze, showed a weird prompt on my computer, and then erased all 12 pages of my work. Everything is gone. All I could do was cry. My "Type-A" self tends to stress out about school projects, but I was so excited about this one. Each section was carefully depicted in only the most academic language. I could reference this file any time I needed a quick book idea...
Hubs helped as much as he could, but each word I retyped seemed frustratingly empty. It looks ok now, but not as good as the original. It's just frustrating when you do your best, and it's not enough. (You may be getting the hint that this blog is not actually about the project... so am I) He's been applying for jobs for the past 2 years. I see his heart, and I've seen the quality of his
work- it's so good. Just don't understand why...I know - it's not meant for me to comprehend. Despite this less than marvelous Monday, I feel God rearranging my priorities and strengthening my faith.
The winter flower blooms when everything else dies. Driven by an internal force greater than they can withstand, the tender shoots push upwards past the icy grave. When all else is burried deep beneath the snow, the rich red blossoms slowly unfurl. They open up towards a darkened sky, where only the bravest remain. They are glorious.
Jason Gray wrote an amazing song called, "The Cut" - it seems so appropriate for the season
"You peel back the bark and tear me apart, to get the heart of what matters most. I'm cold and i'm scared as your love lays me bare, but in the shaping of my soul the cut makes me whole."
2 comments:
I have the cure for all ills right here...but not ready to share him for sleep-overs yet. :)
Sorry to hear about your rough day & worries. Hang in there & keep hope in your heart. On Wednesday you'll be able to look into these little eyes and be reminded of just what can blossom after the most difficult of times. And if that doesn't work, there's always a round of ticklemonster belly laughs for a guaranteed mood lifter!
Whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger... so as long as we don't die, I guess we only have one option here.
Let's go get pruned!
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